Southern Oregon Living: December 2011

Happy Howlidays!

May you be wrapped in the warmth and love of family and friends on this special day.

May each moment be filled with joy and blessings.

And may the light of the world shine brightly in your homes today and every day.   

Merry Christmas and Happy Howlidays from The Naked Blogger!

Lumps of coal... Anyone?  If you've ever played the white elephant gift game at a Christmas party, you know exactly what I'm taking about when I refer to lumps of coal.  It's the gift that no one wants and everyone tries to get rid of.  

I've had my share of lumps of coal... I was put up for adoption when I was born (fortunately my mother came and got me after 4 weeks... but I think I still have abandonment issues).  I was raised by a disabled single mother with Multiple Sclerosis.  We were the poor family on welfare in a middle-class neighborhood.  I was sexually abused by a babysitter at age six.  I was beaten by a step-father from age six to nine.  I lived with a crazy family (when I was 9) who had schizophrenic adult children running around with butcher knives at midnight yelling... It's the end of the world!  I lived in many HUD homes that were terribly sub-standard.  I worked from the time I was 10-yrs old collecting bottles door to door.  And, on my first babysitting job, at age 11, the house burnt down on my watch.  It was also my last babysitting job.

Lumps of Coal... It's the gift that keeps on giving!  I've been discriminated against for job promotions.  I failed miserably in business which left me $150K in debt.  I had a car accident that herniated two discs in my neck and tore my rotator cuff.  I've had several lumps (tumors) removed from my body that were fortunately benign.  I've had my heart broken more than once.  And the list goes on.  I think I know a little something about lumps of coal ;)

If there's one thing that's certain, it's that life is filled with lumps.  And those lumps are sometimes given to us as gifts (life's lessons).  It's what we do with them that defines us.  You don't have to be naughty or nice to appreciate the gift.  You simply need to pick yourself up, brush yourself off, and make the world a brighter place by warming the hearts and souls of others.  If we do that... just think how we could solve the world's energy crisis with just a few lumps of coal ;)

A Friendship Prayer from The Naked Blogger

Lord... thank you for the love you've placed in my life through the friends you've given me.  They bring me warmth when the days are cold, they are music to my soul when I'm overwhelmed by silence, and they provide joy when sadness dawns above and below me. 

May I be a loving friend to each one of them as well.  Fill me anew with your love that I may pass it along generously to those in need.

Hugs & Amen

Dancing with the Stars of Active Rain!  Dancing is an activity that engages my senses on every level.  And music is the invitation to the soul that allows us to delight in harmonious melody on the dance floor.  Listen to this song and tell me it doesn't ignite your senses and move you.  The rhythm is exciting, enticing and engaging.  There's something quite passionate about Lawson Rollins music!  

You don't have to be a dancing star to have rhythm in the Rain.  Many up and coming rainers have danced to the beat of a different drum here.  We've watched their moves and we've delighted in their grooves.  We've showered them with adulation by subscribing to their dance and featuring them on stage.  Here are a few of my favs that have engaged my senses this year...

Mimi Foster waltzed into our lives by sharing her heartfelt and touching personal stories from Colorado Springs.  Richard Yates... (AKA... Mr. Chippendale) showed us a few of his disco moves in the car and at the gym in Mission Viejo.  Debb Janes performed the fox trot on the green trails of Camas.  Brian L. Sirota (AKA... Dr. Seuss) wowed us with his two-step by sharing his two-for-one niche as a Realtor/Attorney in Orange County.  Gayle Rich-Boxman showed us her sassy samba moves on her pontoon at Fishhawk Lake.   Alan May knows a little something about  jive talkin' in Evanston.  Ron and Alexandra Seigel demonstrated their tango of love by keeping in sync in Carpinteria.  And a few of our Active Rain stars have shaken things up on the International dance floor too.  Patricia Feager so eloquently tip-toed through the tulips of Switzerland with her lovely daughter.  Kristine Ginsberg set the stage for for us while doing the cha cha in Anguilla with her adorable hubby.  And our local and lovable David Ames did the quickstep through the streets of San Francisco... without getting a speeding ticket!    

And now... (drum roll please), allow me to introduce you to a new star on the Active Rain horizon... Phil Holm.  Phil, along with his trumpet, has some jazzy rumba moves that will flow quite nicely on the Active Rain dance floor.  Welcome Phil!  You're dancing among the stars now, so get ready to rumba baby!

Dancing with the Stars of Active Rain!

Dishing with Diplomacy... is really an art, perhaps a lost one.  It's easy to get a little torqued when someone pisses in your cheerios.  Who hasn't lost their cool about something at some time or another?  It's always challenging to carefully craft your responses to provocations in the heat of the moment.  

I admit, I haven't always been successful in crafting my responses in pressure cooker situations, but I've always tried to be a diplomat.  When I choose the battles that are worth fighting, I'm always mindful of the potential outcome, good or bad.  It's the risk I take when I've made the decision to firmly plant my heels in the ground on an issue.  Fortunately for me, my battles are few.  Most of life's daily aggravations can be swept under the carpet for another time... or perhaps never to be dealt with at all (i.e. sweeping with diplomacy).

What happens when you're feeling backed in a corner?  When a situation raises its ugly head, it's often our egotistical personalities that get in the way... creating an opportunity for diplomacy to ride in on a white horse.  There are several responses you can choose to deal with those ugly heads... You can be silent (which doesn't always work), you can come out swinging (which isn't always preferred), or you can dish with diplomacy (a nice alternative to violence).  We often think of diplomacy when referring to heads of state.  Wikipedia defines it as... the art and practice of conducting negotiations between representatives of groups.  As you can see, diplomacy is a highly coveted attribute, which can be beneficial in business and personal relationships alike. 

Diplomacy isn't for weenies, or for the faint of heart.  How do we exemplify diplomacy while expressing our strong opinions or beliefs?  Sometimes it's best to bite our tongue (not literally, of course).  Sometimes we must be the 'bigger person' by going the extra mile with consideration.  And sometimes it's prudent to hold back our snarky smirk or the sarcasim we'd like to spew on our opponent.  Dishing with diplomacy can be an opportunity for creating a win-win scenario.  Only you know how far you're willing to go to create a win for both sides.  Sometimes, a mutual win simply isn't possible, and that's okay too! 

So, the next time your tea kettle starts to boil over and you feel like spouting off, consider how you might dish with diplomacy.  Remember to brace yourself for impact after digging in your heels on an issue (if you choose to fight a battle).  Do everything within your power to minimize damages.  Create good boundaries to prevent further disputes.  And leave the rest to the diplomatic gods... with no regrets!

It's How You Live... (I love this song!)

 It's a song about living life with no regrets.  It's a song about not letting the cares of life cause you to miss embracing moments.  It's a song about relishing the simple things.  It's a song about giving.  It's a song about loving.  It's a song about acceptance.  It's a song that says... self importance means nothing in the end.  Live, love and laugh today!  Now turn up the music and sing along with me ;)

Wake up to the sunlight
With your windows open
Don't hold in your anger or leave things unspoken
Wear your red dress
Use your good dishes
Make a big mess and make lots of wishes
Have what you want
But want what you have
And don't spend your life lookin' back

Chorus:
Turn up the music
Turn it up loud
Take a few chances
Let it all out
You won't regret it
Lookin' back from where you have been
Cuz it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live

Verse 2:
So go to the ballgames
And go to the ballet
And go see your folks more than just on the holidays
Kiss all your children
Dance with your wife
Tell your husband you love him every night
Don't run from the truth
Cuz you can't get away
Just face it and you'll be okay

Chorus:
Turn up the music
Turn it up loud
Take a few chances
Let it all out
You won't regret it
Lookin' back from where you have been
Cuz it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live

Bridge:
Oh where ever you are and where ever you've been
Now is the time to begin

Verse 3:
So give to the needy
And pray for the grieving
Even when you don't think that you can
Cuz all that you do is bound to come back to you
So think of your fellow man
Make peace with God and make peace with yourself
Cuz in the end there's nobody else

Chorus:
Turn up the music
Turn it up loud
Take a few chances
Let it all out
Cuz you won't regret it
Lookin' back from where you have been
Cuz it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live

Cuz it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live!

Is it Wine-Thirty Yet?  When I opened my real estate brokerage three years ago, there was a reason I called it Real Estate Cafe.  I wanted to provide a concierge of services in a warm and inviting boutique-style real estate office where agents and clients could gather and view properties by the fireplace, much like the living room in their own home. 

It's not your typical real estate office by any means, but certainly one with atmosphere and ambiance, where agents love to work and clients love to sit by the fireplace and chat about real estate over a freshly brewed cappuccino. I was fortunate to lease a beautiful historic craftsman style building in downtown Grants Pass, built in 1908, rich with history, charm, stained glass windows, hardwood floors and a fireplace with a beautiful mantle.  Talk about warm and cozy! 

Much of what happens at Real Estate Cafe, happens in our kitchen, where there's something good always brewing.  Just when things start to wind down at the end of the day... the party begins when one of my agents asks... Is it wine-thirty yet?  We usually break into laughter and open a bottle of Two-Buck Chuck (courtesy of Trader Joe's and Broker Mel).  And while I'm not a drinker (although I've dipped my toes in the water a few times recently), I provide red and white (and sparkling pomegranate) juice for all to partake in fellowship.  

It's a good time at Real Estate Cafe.  The days of standing around the water cooler have been replaced with afternoons standing around the wine rack, enjoying a little sippy sippy.  And believe it or not, more information is exchanged in our kitchen between agents, than any office meeting or weekly MLS tour.  Why?  Perhaps it's the wine!  When you spend 4-8 hours a day with the same people each week, you get to know them pretty well... sometimes too well ;)  Frankly, that's the reason we let our hair down in the afternoons and relax at Real Estate Cafe.  Two-Buck Chuck is a small price to pay for camaraderie.  And you know what they say... All work and no play... ;)  So, the next time your computer displays a funky message (like the one above), we hope you'll think of us having a good time laughing and enjoying life at the cafe.  Care to join us? 

Is it Wine-Thirty Yet?

Santa's 12-Step Program for Clutterbugs!  I love the holidays... Christmas music, the smell of pine trees and sparkling lights make me happy and joyful.  Although, there's one thing about the holidays that's really a buzz kill for me, and that's being buried knee-deep in piles of paperwork with pressing tedious tasks that require lots of time and energy.  

I usually find myself scrambling this time of year to update my database so I can prepare my Christmas newsletter and mail calendars to my clients, family and friends.  If you're anything like me (and Alan May), you've got a desk that looks like the Tower of Babel, with paperwork overflowing to all corners of the earth.  It's never-ending and somewhat overwhelming.  

I've decided to take  Santa's  advice... I'm entering Santa's 12-Step Program for Clutterbugs in an attempt to overcome my lifelong obsession to clutter.  It's time.  At Santa's prodding, I'm making a list and checking it twice.  I know I've been naughty... and I really want to be nice.  

I'm confessing my clutterbug ways, cleaning-up my act, and committing to a better filing system for 2012.  I'm going to make you proud Santa... I promise ;)  

Santa's 12-step Program for Clutterbugs includes: 

1.   Admit that you are powerless over your piles of paperwork. (done)

2.   Hire someone who is good at decluttering stuff. (done)

3.   Give that person carte blanche to organize your paperwork. (done)

4.   Clean off your desk and remove all signs of clutter. (in progress)

5.   Toss or donate all magazines and journals that are sitting in a pile collecting dust. (in progress)

6.   Shred all docs with sensitive information. (in progress)

7.   Purchase a file cabinet to store your newly organized files. (in progress)

8.   Update your database. (in progress)

9.   Delete old emails. (in progress)

10. Back-up important files. (in progress)

11. Develop a business plan for 2012. (in progress)

12. Spend more time baking cookies for Santa. (hoping... ;)

Here's a little glimpse of my home office... and the clutterbug grinch that's stealing my Christmas! 

Something beautiful.  As I was driving along Interstate 5 in Southern Oregon this afternoon, I found myself singing along to a song called Something Beautiful by The Newsboys, and noticing several nuances that caught my attention.  The lyrics to the song totally embodied my thoughts of the day and I was captivated by the beautiful scenery.

I saw a couple of motorcyclists riding along in their black leathers with red santa hats.  The red hats caught my eye and made me laugh.  Something beautiful. 

The cloud covering was fairly thick today, but I could still see patches of blue skies peeking through, as if to say... I see you!  Something beautiful.

When I arrived at my favorite coffee house... Mellelo, I asked if they had any bear claws... they did.  I enjoyed one along with a mocha.  Something beautiful.

Then I stopped by my favorite resale boutique, Prism, and I found a gorgeous black dress and some cute boots.  Something beautiful.

I called a friend that I've been missing and we chatted about life and all it's interesting moments.  Something beautiful.

My senses are often fully engaged in unfamiliar environments that are colorful, captivating, heartfelt and amusing.  I look for something beautiful in everything I see, hear and do.  It's a subtle reminder that I'm happy to feel alive and kicking ;-) 

May you find something beautiful that makes you smile today!